Hella Good

It’s amazing how with just a few strokes of keys, one can shrug off so much. Neat and measured deletions – and just like that, it’s gone. Sometimes, you gotta love the computer for keeping things so impersonal. If you hit the right ones, you never run the risk of stumbling upon what you’d hidden away from yourself.

I’m reading Sylvia Plath’s The Bell Jar, so pardon me if I sound like I’m far away. I still remember her poetry from high school days – it was too disturbing for our impressionable minds, and to date, I remember Tulips, Lazy Lazarus, Daddy, etc. and how every analysis somehow lead to her depression and suicide attempts. Disturbing, but beautiful. Sigh. This is her only novel, and is just as remarkable as her poems. Unfortunately, it leaves one almost devoid of life, much like the protagonist.

Plenty of changes taking place these days; my good friend and team mate from work is serving the last 2 weeks of his notice, before he leaves to pursue his real interest - writing. My manager, is also serving her notice. She will leave the company in about 3 weeks. Her extensive knowledge of the business and 10 years of experience is something I doubt many people can match. Neither can they match her caring and understanding nature, and her willingness to indulge in our silly games, drinking, and partying, and gossiping. The boss told me that I’ll be fine, and that after a few years, people moving on and leaving would stop bothering me and I wouldn’t get so attached. I hope he’s right – because you know how much I hate people leaving.

Whenever I reach a phase in my life, when things should be stable and straight forward, and I start to think – oh hey, maybe I can get a breather, new uncertainties haunt me. It’s a pattern, which repeats itself such as the chaos is about to clear. Maybe I should stop wishing for simplicity – maybe if I can convince myself that it’ll just be too dull, I will stop wanting it so bad.

Told the boss I need time off, and have extended the Labor Day holiday into a long weekend. Plans are to laze by the beach, pamper self at the spa, recharge by the water sports, and get a change of scene. Bookings have been confirmed, and all that remains is the count down. I also plan to forget my hand phone at home.

Coming Sunday, I fly off to Manila! When I’d gone down to the Philippines Embassy, something reminded me of my teenage crush. A Filipino guy - cute, popular, friendly, and funny – oh how I adored AB! Do people still have crushes these days? It seems so passé!

On a more cheerful note, an hour ago, I spoke to the mother about coming home later in May, when the bro will be home too. I also told her that I’m booking us into a full day spa treatment, which she’ll just have to come for, no questions asked, as we leave the men behind at home. I love how I can order everyone around at home!

Seeing as I have plenty to look forward to, things aren’t looking too bad! It’s the damn book, I tell you.

"It's been so long since I've seen the ocean..."

I went on a crazy shopping spree this weekend, and I am very pleased with myself. I have developed this new tendency to shop – and do that non stop, when I’m nervous about the turns of life. Thankfully, not many things make me nervous enough these days to go swipe plastic everywhere. Else, I’d be in so much trouble!

Its been a kick-ass Monday. Yes, I just used the words Kick ass and Monday in the same sentence. The boss is away on business trip, to a place where the time zone is in our favor – so that his working hours and our starting/break/lunch hours clash perfectly. Therefore, he can never find us! We are gonna savor every minute of the next 3 days! Don’t get me wrong, we love our boss. It’s just that these days we’re all so swamped, and his requests, typically “things that shouldn’t take more than 15” actually do – and they are never ending. Before we know it, its 6pm and we haven’t touched a thing on our to do list. I was surprisingly chirpy today – and got tons done. Just to make it better, my very girly, retro dress, was a hit at the office!

I continued the shopping spree from yesterday and went to buy some more gym stuff – shorts, tees, and a gym bag! Now I have no excuse to not go! Sobs!

I bet if I’d read my horoscope today, it’d have read “BEWARE!! do not make any financial transactions today – or else your wallet will burst into flames!” I tried to expense my corporate card bill and realized that the hotel had double charged me. called them up, and the manager called back and apologized for their boo boo. Tried to pay bills online (there are so many bills that its not even funny!) and the internet kept disconnecting as I hit “confirm” I might just have paid my phone bill 5 times. Argh! N my credit card company fucked up my account statement and was charging me an odd 500 bucks extra. It really isn’t a good day for bills.

I need a holiday – doing grown uppy things is tiring! Plans for the Good Friday weekend are floating about and I am very excited. Mom might be coming by for a week sometime soon too! I have to make the Manila trip happen somehow, and some friends from work and I are planning on a backpacking trip to India! Planning holidays is so much more fun than setting accounts, paying bills, and figuring out that you have no money left!

I’m just in an usually good mood – and I shall go to bed grinning like Cheshire cat now!

"It's been so long since I've seen the ocean..." - Long December, Counting Crows

"It's been so long since I've seen the ocean..."

I went on a crazy shopping spree this weekend, and I am very pleased with myself. I have developed this new tendency to shop – and do that non stop, when I’m nervous about the turns of life. Thankfully, not many things make me nervous enough these days to go swipe plastic everywhere. Else, I’d be in so much trouble!

Its been a kick-ass Monday. Yes, I just used the words Kick ass and Monday in the same sentence. The boss is away on business trip, to a place where the time zone is in our favor – so that his working hours and our starting/break/lunch hours clash perfectly. Therefore, he can never find us! We are gonna savor every minute of the next 3 days! Don’t get me wrong, we love our boss. It’s just that these days we’re all so swamped, and his requests, typically “things that shouldn’t take more than 15” actually do – and they are never ending. Before we know it, its 6pm and we haven’t touched a thing on our to do list. I was surprisingly chirpy today – and got tons done. Just to make it better, my very girly, retro dress, was a hit at the office!

I continued the shopping spree from yesterday and went to buy some more gym stuff – shorts, tees, and a gym bag! Now I have no excuse to not go! Sobs!

I bet if I’d read my horoscope today, it’d have read “BEWARE!! do not make any financial transactions today – or else your wallet will burst into flames!” I tried to expense my corporate card bill and realized that the hotel had double charged me. called them up, and the manager called back and apologized for their boo boo. Tried to pay bills online (there are so many bills that its not even funny!) and the internet kept disconnecting as I hit “confirm” I might just have paid my phone bill 5 times. Argh! N my credit card company fucked up my account statement and was charging me an odd 500 bucks extra. It really isn’t a good day for bills.

I need a holiday – doing grown uppy things is tiring! Plans for the Good Friday weekend are floating about and I am very excited. Mom might be coming by for a week sometime soon too! I have to make the Manila trip happen somehow, and some friends from work and I are planning on a backpacking trip to India! Planning holidays is so much more fun than setting accounts, paying bills, and figuring out that you have no money left!

I’m just in an usually good mood – and I shall go to bed grinning like Cheshire cat now!

"It's been so long since I've seen the ocean..." - Long December, Counting Crows

Boss, I quit!

I haven’t written in a while, I realize; and although nothing noteworthy has happened, I just feel this need to recap. Don’t ask!

* Work’s been crazy busy – and the usually good natured individuals of my team have turned into ill-tempered, frustrated, over-worked zombies, who are ready to bite anyone who gets in their way. Pleasant, proper English has been replaced by a colorful dialect, spoken by both employees and managers. We don’t discriminate! The only good thing is that even during these stressful times, the team stands to support each other – rather than snapping at each other. Even if it means canceling drinks on a Friday – to keep someone company, who’s file crashes just as she was about to send it off.

* I’ve seen some bad days myself – classic being the day I met my mentor for our regular sessions, and I oh-so-casually said “I was thinking of quitting yesterday. But I couldn’t look for other jobs online, cuz I was on a call till late night.” Imagine the man’s surprise as he tries to calm down the same girl, who, 2 months ago, had told him how much she loved her job. Oh well, we all have our days.

* V-day saw me in the office till 1145pm with my entire team. We did however, have dinner together, and happily expensed it on the company. Cocktails n all. Whoopdidoo. Let’s not forget, though, that I did have my fair share of flowers and chocolates and the like.

* V-day was also the Little One’s birthday, and I conveniently misplaced his phone no. I am such a horrible sister! I had to get his phone number from his room-mates sister, who happens to be one of my closest high school friends. (Yeah, coincidence!)

* The 4 day weekend was spent indulging in one or more of the following – sleeping, eating, drinking, bumming, couch-potato-ing, and doing nothing useful. For the entire 4 days.

*Well, 3 actually. On the last day, I got out of my lazy mode, and went to the nearest mall on a whim. I spent 2 hours in a bookstore checking out books on everything – from photography to self help to management to cooking, and then finally settled in a cozy corner near the Literature section. I scanned through a few pages of “Who Moved My Blackberry”, which was hilarious! It’s a hilarious compilation of a marketing executives emails to family, friends, and the bosses. 8 months into the corporate world and I could appreciate the humor in the book and the mockery of corporate jargon! I swear, I was laughing out loud to myself! I finally left with Milan Kundera’s Laughable Loves, which I am loving absolutely. More on that later!

* At this very moment, I am thinking of why I allow myself to get involved in things which I know will result in me being confused/angry/upset or all 3. I absolutely ignore the little voice in my head that says “If you want to sleep peacefully tonight, do NOT do this!!!”

* Knowing what’s the right thing to do, and doing it, are two very different things. poles apart. Sigh.

*So yeah, life’s been okay – from the dumps of late nights at work, to the absolutely high from alcohol and good times with friends.

I’m not complaining. I guess.