vacation checklist

Like all good things, this trip home has come to an end too!

Sob Sob Sob! :(

Considering this is my last holiday home before I graduate, I had some very elaborate plans to avoid social gatherings and laze around n do absolutely nothing most of the time! That, n a few other things...

Decided to go through my check list for the holidays to evaluate how well my plans turned out!

- Sleep loads: check…the weather couldn’t have been better! Thailand is beautiful in December

- Quality time with mom: check…no TV n internet unless she’s away or sleeping…talked a lot...caught up on everything!

- Talk to bro about uni: errrrrr….din get to do that! We ended up watching way too much Family Guy n other silly TV shows…I did help him with some applications though! N I was nice to him during his exams...so that makes up for it!

- Family time : check…most meals n the entire weekend with family!

- Avoid the internet n the phone : check! I am actually proud I managed to stay away from the computer for so long, esp. now with the decent internet connection and a computer at my disposal at all times!

- Exercise: check….sortaa….hehehehe…jogged on most days that I was in! Was usually away during the evenings…n mornings were too cold!

- Eat good food: hell yeah! A HUGE CHECK!

- Read: check…I managed to finish two books…n halfway through the third! I was hoping to finish 5 of them but there are only 24 hrs in a day …n the eating n sleeping n shopping took too much time!

- Shop: yet another HUGE CHECK! Tons n tons of shopping done! Dad thinks we can smell a SALE sign from miles! He's not completely wrong... ;)

- Meet high school friends: check! N had such an awesome time…thank god, somethings don’t change…too much!

- Bake a cake for X’mas: din manage this one! Ended up going out for lunch n spent the rest of the day shopping...for mom n dad! It was the one day when I went out shopping n din buy anything for myself!

- FYP report : I haven’t even looked at it…which is why I’m gonna be in a huge mess once I get back…!

- Plan the next sem…n a whole bunch of things: Too much thinking required…so postponed for a bit…the strategy is to keep running till I’m cornered!

Hmmmmmmmm

So looks like I got most of the important stuff done! =)

Its all about getting ur priorities right, isn’t it? ;)

sights n sounds...

Random sights and sounds that never fail to warm the heart

• The pink blue sky every evening from my balcony…for some reason, I always miss the sunsets in Singapore…the evening literally sneaks in…
• The soft knock on the door at 545 waking me up to go to work during one summer
• Signs that include the word : SALE
• Beach chairs, umbrellas, n the uninterrupted view of the sea
• The familiar skyline as the plane descends
• Roar of the speedboat engine
• The doorbell marking a much – anticipated arrival
• The out – of – tune Happy Birthday song, every birthday! :
• The one familiar face that you have been searching for in the crowd of passengers who have just arrived
• The familiar face on the other side, when you're the recently arrived passenger
  
• The insides of a surprise present
• The oven timer…the cake’s finally ready after filling the whole house with the freshly baked smell!
• The boarding announcement for a flight home
• High school friends at Emporium, outside CD warehouse, coming up the escalator
• Childhood pictures of us at his house, same frame, same wall, same room… for more than 15 years
• Dairy Queen n the upside down blizzard
• The rough sea against the rocks…strangely soothing
• The buzz of aircon
• My blue lamp in an otherwise dark room
• The unexpected voice on the other end when you answer a call
  
• Your own voice as the greeting on the answering machine, years after you’ve left home
• A forgotten favorite song that comes up when playing music on shuffle mode
  
• Flowers at your door
• Ghazals as we drive back home late at night
• Dessert that's too pretty to dig in
  …the list goes on, so will keep adding …

Peace...

I was strangely at peace yesterday...

Its *strange* because I dont remember the last time I felt just peaceful or content without having something nagging me in the back of my head.

Slept in late cuz it was so cold! Woke up n awesome breakfast...away from the computer...TV in the background, n read "Veronika Decides to Die" by Paulo Coehlo. Its not as depressing as it sounds, but it was a rather slow n heavy read. But at several points in the book, I found myself so thankful for everything I have, n every minute of my life. I guess once you put on the shoes of someone (Veronika) who had only a week left to live, you'd find a lot in ur life that ur grateful for.

Life seemed beautiful!

Pleasant weather...Mom Dad n bro, the whole family around the dinner table...a loving family at home.

Email from someone who can make you feel so special n so loved!
Talking to friends..., some, after months...n we picked up from exactly where we left..

others, who I'll be meeting back in Singapore soon

All in all, I was content...I had no complaints...just a smile on my face. Slept oh so peacefully too.

Its either the weather or the food or being home or being in a Buddhist country! :)

Either way, it was a welcome break from the otherwise tangled n anxious mind of mine. It was like living life on a pause. Sortaa like meditation, except longer...

Effortless existence...just what I'd wanted.

It didnt last too long...simplicity never does...But it was good while it lasted.

Oh n I started a list of random things I really wanna do at some point in life. So far

• wear war paint on my face n watch a live game in a stadium...soccer? football?? anything :
• lie down in the grass next to a runway n watch a plane take off right above me
• be part of a piece of music...write it, play it, anything...

will add more random things as they occur to me!

too scared to...

"We've replaced nearly all our emotions with fear"
- Paulo Coelho, "Veronika Decides to Die"

effortless existence

bored of staying in...
bored of going out...
bored of eating out...
bored of canteens...
bored of socializing...
bored of working...

so I am back to that colloidal existence! except this time the bag of emotional labor is full...and its time to put it down! The masks are too heavy...too many. Its hard to keep them on.

The fort's too difficult to hold up. n im suddenly claustrophobic. too close, too close. let some air in.

its time to go home...

for good food... sleep...shopping...old friends...mom n daughter time...couch potato afternoons...constant munching...pampering...reading...movies...chores around the house...no laundry....thinking...the beach..peace. peace.

but most of all...raw, effortless existence.